Do you allow yourself?

Do you pay attention if you’re allowing yourself? If you do things for you or the way you’ve been told/think it will be accepted? Do you live according to norms set by somebody else?

Childhood patterns and all the experiences we go through put us in situations where we collect certain behaviours, believes, expressions. Often down the line in life, carrying and using them by default, we usually accept them as our nature, the way we are.

This is not entirely true. In fact, many of the believes and behaviours we carry don’t serve us well and we feel it. But trapped in the years of conditioning, forget to look them from aside and make the conscious decision to change them.

Lately I’ve been in a period of seeing, understanding and desiring to change something seemingly simple in my life, but that has been tripping me for years without me even knowing. I replied I don’t allow myself to live the life I actually want. Why? - because of my childhood condition to follow rules and guidance, that long ago now don’t have any value. I proved to myself I can do things I want, things I desire, if I put my mind into it and take the required steps. Now it’s another transition, seeing how much really all those patterns mean nothing to the adult me now. The child inside tho, scared of rejection, still believes them and here is when it’s time to change the pattern.

By taking actions, small different steps that what used to, we’re able to rewrite the script and change the pattern. Yes, it will take time and it won’t be easy, but the fact that is actually possible keeps be believing its also possible for me.

Don’t let voices, expressions trapped in your inner child’s memory from years long ago to affect your adult life. You have the power to change, to better your human experience simply by making the decision to take action in beneficial for you direction.

How to prepare for a Boudoir photo session?

Have you always wanted to experience a boudoir photo session, but maybe felt some insecurity about taking your clothes off in front of a stranger?

Worry no more, I got you, girl! I’m here for you!

My boudoir sessions are tailored for women with or without experience in front of the camera or with minimal clothing. The target is always one - to feel more comfortable in your own skin. I believe boudoir photography can help women feel freer and unapologetically themselves when they appreciate the beauty and intelligence of their own bodies. Bodies that go through so much transformation during their life and fully deserve to be acknowledged for it, appreciated and valued for their magnificence.

That’s why I’m here - to help people enjoy themselves in their own skin. Clothes and accessories are fun, but they also build a barrier, restrictions, putting certain norms and telling a story. But it not our nature, our authentic appearance as species. The clothed body is not what we actually live in and experience life with, but the nude body is.

The boudoir session is not necessarily a nude one, however surely it could transform if you decide so. I understand the sensitivity of the matter, that there could be certain boundaries and fully respect every individual's point of view.

So what do you need to prepare for a boudoir session?

It is actually very easy:
-decide how you’d like to be photographed
-pick up some outfits/looks
-decide how much of makeover suits you best
-and then just bring your gorgeous presence in the studio!

How would you like to be photographed?

We’ll discuss this more in detail in your pre-shoot consultation. Meanwhile, you can see examples in my work that resonate with you most and you would like to have your own photographs in the same style. Or you’re more than welcome to share any ideas that you have and dream about. I’m always open to experiment and create the best visuals of yourself you’ve seen.

What outfits would you like?

Feel free to share with me even before something that you’d like to wear. I would suggest you to get out of the box and norms if you secretly wanted to. This is a safe space for you where we’ll play, laugh and enjoy your beauty and uniqueness. A place where you can experiment and dress up as whoever you want. You can be with lingerie or any intimate wear or much more minimal and bare. The less the fashion, the more it focuses on your and your gorgeous body. But I let you decide.

If you feel like trying more nude look, you don’t necessarily have to be fully nude. For me is health and safety first so you can wear some minimal thongs that I can hide with poising or later on Photoshop if you want to look nude on your photographs.

How much makeover suits you best?

This option I left open for clients as some of them prefer more natural and minimal look. Boudoir sessions don’t have to have the heavy saturated makeover where you can’t recognise yourself. I’m here to capture you the way you want it to be and won’t force on you anything that can make you feel not yourself. I know make-up can sometimes change the look and idea of who we want to appear as. Therefore, the sessions I do include natural makeover, focused on your natural beauty. But if you prefer to go beyond the way you usually present yourself, we’ll help you with that. We can discuss all the small details before the session to make sure everything is the way you want it to be.

And last one is to just bring your awesomeness in the studio!

Again, keep i n mind this is a safe place for you. Somewhere where you can be yourself with no norms or ideals. I’m here to portray your uniqueness and celebrate you, because you deserve it! Feel free to share anything else you have in mind or any concerns that come up.

I listen carefully what clients tell me about their bodies, what they like and dislike about them. So I try to capture all of it, the more and less loved parts of they bodies in a way that they’ll love all of it. Our bodies are beautiful, despite the differences. In fact the differences are those that make them so unique, so let’s celebrate it!

Do you listen to your body?

Do you listen in the silence of your own? Are you ever in enough silence to hear? And if you do hear, do you follow up or ignore?

The body.. One of my main subjects in my work and in my own personal life. All the beauty I see and intent to capture, mixed with all the challenges I’ve faced with and within my own. A diary I will probably write until the end.

Our magnificent, intelligent bodies are guiding us, telling us what we need to know in every moment. Unfortunately, we don’t always listen. Rather the contrary - we try to numb the feelings, so we can escape either responsibility or the acknowledgement that we need to make a change of some sort. Here is one example - the anxiety.

I didn’t know when it appeared in my life, but I do know now I’ve tried many times to numb the fearful feeling through physical or emotional substances. To only end up hurting myself more. Why do I this? - I asked myself so many times. I’m yet not sure, all I know is that photography has helped me many times up to this day.

In creation we loose idea about time, space and fear. Preset moment eliminates anxiety, it focuses your mind, giving you the space and security of the present. We’re often so lost in the past of in the future, that we forget to pay attention to the only moment we actually have - the now. I know you’ve heard this before, but do you practice it?

Here is me now, writing this with an anxious heart. My body is not calm, my mind is afraid. All I know is I’m not alone, maybe you’re accompanying me now or can relate to it. Why don’t we listen more? Why don’t we believe in our own body intelligence and guidance to show us what to do, who to love, what to trust and where to go? We tent to trust in others that have no idea how we feel or what we dream about.

Don’t let the fear stops you, don’t let it freeze you. Listen to your body, it knows you better than you think. Trust it, as it’s the only body that will never betray you, the only one that will be there for you always. The one that holds the guidance and support you need to go through life.

Why seeing yourself in pictures can make you more confident?

Seeing yourself in pictures is an experience much deeper than we usually assume. As we live in our bodies day in and day out, we don’t usually spend a lot of time seeing our own physical appearance than those of other people around us. We spend more time looking at our family, friends, colleagues, than looking at ourselves, which can cause disconnection with our own bodies. Observing ourselves in the mirror for example is a proven technique that does magic in connecting us with ourselves on a profound level.

I truly believe seeing yourself in beautiful pictures can boost self esteem and be a reason to celebrate life as it is. It also helps for accepting and valuing the body you live in in this lifetime.

I’ve noticed that in the early years of our life we usually gain confidence from our physical appearance, being phrased for it, liked by others or gaining attention due to it. As time goes and life forces us to go through hardships and unexpected, unplanned situations, our source of confidence changes. Our confidence becomes based on our personal and professional achievements, goals we have achieved or obstacles we have overcome.

And as time goes, so do our bodies change. We age, we collect scars and traumas - it’s the inevitable circle of life. This is another reason why photography can actually help us stay connected to and appreciate ourselves more.

So, you might ask, why can help with our confidence? Why two dimensional images, that are often additionally manipulated in Photoshop, can successfully boost our internal state of being? Isn’t this cheating and how come our brain believes it?

• Why with Photography?

Photography is an art form that plays with light. The light by itself can be manipulated in order to gain the most pleasing to the eye result. So even before Photoshop, the light that paints the photograph is a tool that photographers use to capture moments, create art and visually freeze a fraction of time for eternity.

As humans, we consume the world 90% through our visual senses. What we look at can have uplifting or damaging effects. How we think about ourselves is usually not how we actually look. Our self critic is judging hard without even pointing at the preciousness we already possess as humans.

• It’s not cheating - it’s Self care

In our everyday life we are exposed to vast amount of images of other people's life and journeys. Social media made the comparison and strive for perfection a normality that has vast amount of pros and cons. Photo retouch and filters just add on to that illusion that somebody else’s life is perfect than yours. ‘‘Grass is always green on the other side’’. Or isn’t it in fact greener where it has been watered?

We’re all different, we look different, we have different lives, we value different things. Having beautiful photographs of yourself is a way to accept and appreciate more who you are in this physical form, to accept and value the body you live in for some years. We believe what we see, and so a beautiful presentation of yourself can boost up your confidence and mute the negative voice in your head that keeps comparing you to others. I truly believe everyone can look beautiful in pictures and one must own many of them.

• It’s a way to know yourself more

We spent most of our time observing the world around us. We look at our partners, family, children, friends more than we look at our own selves. We stare at them filled with love and admiration of their spirit and/or body. But we don’t really observe ourselves as much and often with much less of any appreciation at all.

When you see your body presented in a pleasing to the eye way, you start valuing more the beauty of it. The shapes and forms it has, the symmetry, the colours and textures that compliment it. To know yourself more is to acknowledge and learn to respect both your inner and outer self. Accepting the body you were given to live in will bring you peace and compassion. A body that does its job to keep you alive, healthy and intelligently notifying you when you need to change or re-adjust.

Your body is your best friend and it deserves to be appreciated, admired and looked at with love and compassion. To have beautiful photographs of it is a way to celebrate it here and now. It is also a way to be remembered in history and for future generations.